Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Scary. Shit.

I'd like to have kids. I've always suspected I would have kids. I work with kids, and they're really cute and wonderful. There are some kids that I adore so much, I wish I could hang out with them for hours after their lesson on their itty-bitty violin is over. I suspect that my own children would be people I would like to hang out with.

And then I stumble upon this blog, Motherhood Uncensored. And it sounds like her body is in horrific pain all the time. And she had three children in five years. And her husband is always away. And her nipples hurt. And her back hurts. And her husband is always away. And she uses some kind of clamps to breastfeed. And she never has any physical space because the children beg to sit on her lap. And her husband is always away. And she had to lie to him about buying Pay-Per-View porn once. And it sounds like she never gets to leave the house.


My feminist analysis is the following: no one should have to go through this alone, and this woman sounds alone. I know husband and wife can't share the nipple clamping, but in my humble opinion, they ought to share more than this.

Or is motherhood really just this hellish?


Arvilla said...

And this is a woman who is lucky enough to even HAVE a committed partner while she's going through this. Oh God...

Today at work I was IMing a coworker who was working from home with her 1 year old. Her one year old was sick and puked all over her repeatedly while she was trying to earn her pay check. So, she'd have to clock out and go give baby a bath, then come back and try to work while holding her miserably ill little girl. I just...don't know if I could do it...ever...

Clumpy said...

I was going to echo the "committed partner" comment but Arvilla beat me to it.

I like to think that I'd be the type of father to get up at 2 a.m. and console a crying youngster. The biological investment the woman has put into the mere production of the thing pretty much puts the guy in charge of everything he can possibly do after that in my view.

Now, the fact that you've got a kid that decency and hopefully love won't allow you to neglect even though they're around and needy every second. . . that's harder. I guess there are some things that build character and patience if you do them right, but the slightest bit of resentment toward a slacker spouse will ruin it.